First Trimester Q&A

The Details

Dress | Earrings

Happy New Year! I pray you all had a wonderful holiday break and feel refreshed. Or maybe you had the flu as I did and feel in TOTAL denial reality is starting this week. 😉 Either way, I’m sure we are all in good company one feeling or another! I’m 17 weeks now and instead of bumpdates as I did with Maxi’s pregnancy, I thought I’d do trimester Q&A’s this pregnancy. I asked on Instagram any questions you all had and thought this would be a great way for me to personally recap while sharing what you wanted to read about. Let’s get to it!

How did you know you were ready for #2?

Oh goodness, are you ever ready?! I mean who knows. I feel like motherhood in numbers is all relative. For some, going to 2 is no big deal. For others, it’s a game changer. For me, I always knew I wanted at least 2 children, as did Paul. We didn’t really go off any specific timeline. Having grown up watching a mother suffer numerous miscarriages {hence my age gap with my sister} I never felt like an age gap was something you necessarily got to choose. But once Maxi hit about 16-ish months, I really had that yearning that I was ready. We tried for over a year for this pregnancy, and as each month passed that desire grew stronger. When she was around 16 months my mindset also really shifted from, “How do you add another?” to “How can I not add another?

How did you tell your husband?

We were going through fertility testing at the time, so it wasn’t like it was a huge surprise to him or family. We actually went to Santa Barbara the weekend before I was due to have a procedure. I had to go in on a certain day of my cycle, and my parents kept telling us to go out of town to get our minds off of it. While there, I thought the food tasted horrible. Whenever I’m pregnant, I immediately get a strong aversion to alcohol. I couldn’t even smell wine without getting nauseous {I was the same with Maxi!} and so we canceled wine tastings we had, without thinking much of it. I kept telling Paul I felt awful on the plane home, but Maxi had had a bug the week prior so I thought I was just fighting off whatever she had. When we got home, a nurse had called me asking me to take a pregnancy test since I hadn’t started my cycle. I was a little annoyed thinking that my cycle was just off. It was about 4 in the afternoon and Maxi was still napping so I took one. I immediately Facetimed Ashley and my sister and had them confirm the faint line. Then I put the test on the kitchen counter. I set up my phone to film Paul’s reaction when he got home. He came home from work, saw the test, and was as shocked as I was!

Are you exercising and if so, what are you doing?

I am! I couldn’t work out most of my first trimester as I had a bleed early on. But I do pilates and obé’. obé’ is really cool because you can do workout classes in your own home and they have everything from pilates to dance classes. Plus, the classes are only 28 minutes. I’ll turn one on and Maxi will watch me or join in. I try to go to pilates once or twice a week and then will take a class at home another day or two. Code KATEY should get you 30% off your first month if you want to try it!

Are you buying maternity clothes or purchasing loose-fitted/larger items?

I’ve bought these maternity jeans and this maternity dress. I also am living in these leggings which are a total dupe for the Lululemon Align leggings. Get your usual size, they stretch. Right now, I mostly size up/buy loose pieces just because I don’t want to spend a ton of money the first two trimesters on pieces I won’t wear after baby. Free People runs so generous in most pieces that I found I could size up and wear it until the end with Maxi. Then I wore the pieces while nursing her. I also love Target maternity tanks and tees, which I’ll grab this time around, too. I feel like I know how to style a bump in the winter, but am curious to see what I’ll be living in come April/May since I didn’t have a summer baby with Maxi! I’m guessing I’ll be repeating the same 3 maternity dresses. haha.

What TULA products are you using?

I’ll do a pregnancy skincare blog post this month. With TULA, I’m using the sensitive line and my trusty eye balm that I adore! I’m also testing a lot of their 2020 products right now which I can’t wait to share eventually. 😉

Do you switch out makeup or beauty products while pregnant?

I toss retinol and don’t use any complicated serums while pregnant. I recommend making an appointment with your dermatologist when you find out you are pregnant to go over everything. I did that with Maxi and learned so much about percentages of ingredients, etc. While pregnant, I keep things pretty simple, but I don’t switch out makeup.

How do you combat fatigue with a toddler?

I do not and if I do, I do not do it well! haha. I will say, I’m lucky with a toddler that is a great napper. I think I napped with her every single day of my first trimester. The house was in disarray, work was unorganized, I felt behind in every aspect of life. But I had to remind myself daily the first trimester is so tough, and I just had to do what I needed to do. And I needed to nap! haha. I don’t drink caffeine while pregnant, so I just didn’t really know what else to do.

What comforts you with morning sickness?

ZOFRAN. lol. I am prescribed bonjesta {unisom + b6} and Zofran because I get so sick in my pregnancies. Preggie Pops, Sea Bands, none of that stuff works when I’m pregnant. I wish I had better tips, but my medicine and never letting my stomach get empty is the only thing I can muster. I do NOT eat very healthy my first trimester, I can’t. If I eat lettuce or a smoothie, I will want to throw up. My OB is very, “Eat whatever you can keep down the first trimester” then I try to eat much better the rest of pregnancy. I lived off Strawberry Gatorade, Simple Mills Crackers, and bread those first few weeks.

Favorite pregnancy snacks/meals?

I love to top cottage cheese with Everything But the Bagel seasoning and dip Simple Mills Crackers in it. It keeps me fuller longer with the protein and still tastes bland enough to not make me nauseous.

How did you tell Maxi?

I told her from the beginning, but I don’t think she really understood until she could see my belly grow. Now she always kisses my baby, says that baby’s name, and talks about being a big sister.

Has the pregnancy been the same as Maxi’s?

Symptom-wise it has felt so similar, however, I didn’t ever have a bleed with Maxi’s pregnancy. The intense nausea has been the same, and the aversions to sweets in the beginning. I ended up craving sweets around 20 weeks and on with Maxi, so we will see if this baby is the same. I would say the biggest difference I notice is that I never craved sandwiches with maxi and crave them this pregnancy. However, I remember getting a HUGE burst of energy my second trimester with Maxi, and I do not have that this time. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m taking care of a toddler or because it is my second pregnancy, but my energy hasn’t come back, yet.

What have been your cravings or aversions? 

My first trimester, I hate the smell of coffee, like a lot of moms do! Just like with Maxi, sweets grossed me out the first trimester, but meat didn’t this time. With Maxi, I would cook chicken and then Paul would have to beg me to not throw it away because the smell made me so sick. This time, I just barely cooked. 😉 Maxi honestly loved it, she got way more macaroni and cheese than normal. ha. Cravings wise, I waned tomato soup and heated sandwiches first trimester. So far into the second trimester, I keep telling Paul I want a bean burrito, but he has yet to go drive and get me one! haha.

What is one thing you would tell first-time moms?

Everyone loves to say, “Just wait!” If you say you are nauseous they say, “Oh just wait until the baby is here!” If you say you can’t sleep while pregnant, they say, “Just wait until you have a newborn!” If you think having one child is overwhelming they say, “That’s nothing! Just wait until you have two.” I say, “IGNORE THEM!” Each stage is hard because it is new to you. Morning sickness is hard when you are in it. Potty training is hard when you are in it. But me having morning sickness and potty training at the same time isn’t harder than a first-time mom having morning sickness the first time. It’s just different! Right now I’m intimidated on working with two children and I know many of you read my blog and work full-time with three children. It is all stages that seem hard at first. God doesn’t make you run a sprint straight out the gate, you are always prepared for the next stage. Pregnancy insomnia prepares your body to wake up with a newborn, etc. Your life does change, but you will find a new normal, and it is so beautiful. Trust your instincts, you will know far more than you think. I would say, “Just wait” because you will love that baby more than you ever imagined possible and you will be an amazing mother.

How will you prep the only child to become a big? 

I feel so lucky my Nana was a pediatric nurse for her career and is close friends with is the pediatrician she worked for. I am always texting her questions and asked her about this specifically. The pediatrician she worked for said that her advice to parents having a second baby to minimize the acting out behavior from the first child is for mom to spend 1/2 a day a week alone with the 1st child and for Dad to spend 1/2 a day a week with the 1st child. She said this helps to keep the first child from feeling totally pushed aside and she said in her long experience that cuts about 85% of the acting out behavior. I talk a lot about this is Maxi’s baby that she gets to help me with and make it exciting for her as she loves to nurture her babies and Barbies. But I also hired our babysitter for next summer for set times so that I can take Maxi to her swim lessons alone without the baby. This needed to be done for numerous reasons {I don’t want to take a newborn in 100-degree heat!}, but I also think it will be a special time for us twice a week where we can go get snow cones, go to swim lessons, and chat in the car alone. Paul will take Maxi to her Little Gym classes alone on the weekends and they can have their special time. I know that’s not foolproof and every single kid reacts differently, but to prepare US {maybe even more than her} I wanted to go ahead and get a game plan in action.

All my friends that have two or more say to tend to the oldest child first when the baby arrives. If a toddler and a newborn or crying, soothe the toddler first because they will remember, and the baby is typically easier to soothe once they either get milk or a pacifier.

What are you using for stretch marks?

Bio-Oil & this belly serum

What are you looking to purchase for baby #2 and what will you skip this time around?

Right now I’m researching bassinets. I didn’t love the Halo bassinet because the x on the floor caused me to trip over it EVERY single night I got up to get my pump parts. I always thought I was going to break my ankle. I’m trying to decide if I go the SNOO route or a traditional bassinet. Paul is fixed on the SNOO {although he doesn’t get up in the night when we have a newborn lol} and I’m thinking traditional. The SNOO worries me about the transition to crib, even though I know there is a transition prep and method, it still seems like an extra hurdle? But Paul says immediate sleep with two kids is most important. He says we will deal with the transition later. But I fear the 4-month sleep regression and transition more?! I’m rambling, but I keep researching other moms blogging both for now.

In terms of things to skip, this blog post shares things I loved and didn’t love when we had Maxi.

How do you prepare pre-pregnancy?

I wanted to find a prenatal that I loved while trying to get pregnant and my favorite is Ritual. Here is a blog post on them. This is the probiotic I switched to while pregnant. I also stopped using retinol while trying to get pregnant and limited caffeine intake. Limiting caffeine isn’t necessary, but I do it because I don’t drink caffeine while pregnant, so it helps me avoid quitting cold turkey. I also try to eat healthy while trying to get pregnant since I just eat whatever I can keep down the first trimester.

Do you still get gel manicures while pregnant?

I do! My OB has always said that was fine.

What are you looking forward to the most/least with baby #2?

I ended with this question because I loved it. I think the thing that feels so different the second time around is that I know the highs and lows to expect. I fear two things: navigating work and Maxi’s feelings. I’ll be honest, I didn’t fear navigating work that much before I had Maxi because I knew she would nap. This time around, while the baby is napping, I’ll be caring for a toddler. I always feel like I’m failing and don’t have enough to go around, as I think a lot of working moms do. I honestly have no idea how I’ll navigate work and two children with Paul’s work schedule, but I know I’ll figure out whatever works best for our family. Then, I have the natural, “Is Maxi going to hate me during this change?” type of feelings. I always thought that was so weird when moms were nervous to add to the family, and here I am analyzing this at least once a week! But I am so looking forward to the privilege of giving Maxi the gift of a sibling. I know what my sister is to me and so to know Maxi will have a sibling that is her confidant for life means so much. I’m so excited for newborn snuggles, and cuddles, and to experience my heart expanding as every mother says happens. I can’t stop thinking about that moment in the hospital bed where I can hold my two children and it makes me tear up each time! I feel so lucky and can’t wait to meet my little one.

Thank you so much for reading!

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8 Comments

  1. Annaliese wrote:

    Love this so much!! So excited for your growing family and thank you for taking all of us along! 🙂

    xoxo A
    http://www.southernbelleintraining.com

    Published 02 Jan 20Reply
  2. It’s good to hear from you, Katey! Hope you’re well – you look great! 🙂

    Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
    http://charmainenyw.com

    Published 02 Jan 20Reply
  3. Mary wrote:

    I’m 22 weeks right now and my daughter is about 7 months younger than Maxi, so this post really hit home for me! It’s been interesting comparing both pregnancies (cravings, aversions, symptoms). But I agree, I worry soo much about my daughter’s reaction to her new baby brother. She mothers her baby dolls and Disney dolls but she can be a rough and tough toddler, for sure! I’m excited to follow your pregnancy journey again! Your first pregnancy gave me so much inspo for fashion and what to/not to buy for the baby!!

    Published 02 Jan 20Reply
  4. Laura Leigh wrote:

    Really enjoyed reading your answers to these questions! Thank you for sharing these with us! Excited to follow along on your pregnancy journey round two!

    xo Laura Leigh
    http://www.louellareese.com

    Published 02 Jan 20Reply
  5. Kristen E wrote:

    Get the SNOO! We rented one for 3 months this summer for baby #2. Great sleep from the beginning and she transitioned awesome to regular crib around 12 weeks. I would totally get it again. So worth it!

    Published 02 Jan 20Reply
  6. Janie wrote:

    Congratulations! I have a 2 yr old girl and 3 mo old boy, and the greatest challenge has been missing the times it was just me and my daughter together all day, being best friends. I cry sometimes knowing how much she sits around waiting for me to put the baby to sleep, feed him, etc., and how her day is so much less structured than it used to be, but I know they will be best friends, she will be happier with a playmate, and she wont have that bit of selfishness and impatience that are the stereotype of an only-child. It’s awesome you already have a plan to squeeze in your one on one time! I wish I could do that- with exclusively nursing, I haven’t been apart from baby since he was born. I am so excited to continue reading your journey! Oh and you said Maxi calls the baby by name…which implies you know gender…I cant wait for your gender reveal!!! 🙂

    Published 02 Jan 20Reply
  7. Samantha wrote:

    Totally agree about the Halo Bassinet!! Seriously tripped over it every day/night. So excited for your growing family! The BEST feeling in the world!! XO Samantha
    http://www.stylesofsam.com

    Published 03 Jan 20Reply
  8. Christi wrote:

    Congratulations! So excited for you and your husband! I kind of hope it’s a girl, but know you’ll be so happy either way. Thanks for the great tips and advice!

    Published 03 Jan 20Reply